Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Stupid Athlete Tricks

I'm sitting at home and I'm listening to ESPN in the background and I hear the news: 'Cedric Benson arrested for driving under the influence'. I had to start laughing because it's so sad. Then I started thinking, what are these athletes doing? So I decided to get a list of stupid athlete tricks and put them together for our consumption (trust me, it's not alcoholic):

1) Cedric Benson - This is a guy that has some bad luck. He's on a boat with friends and gets pulled over for drinking while boating. The story quickly turns to a 'driving a boat while black' thing. I have to say that I believed that he was wrongly arrested and probably roughed up by police since he admitted in the report that he was yelling for his mom to have her tell the police to stop. Now that's funny when you think about it, but as a brother, he did the right thing, otherwise it could have ended up being a Rodney King incident (and it may have happened that way anyway). So let's just say this first incident is a wash. BUT, then within a month, you are arrested for driving while drinking. Not only are you smiling in your mug shot, but you are out past curfew, AND you are drinking when that already got you in some serious trouble. Add to all of this, these events all happened in Austin, you know, where you went to school and played football,....but obviously their program from ex-football players isn't what you thought it would be. In the end, you get arrested twice, and lose your job in the NFL. At least you did pass the sobriety test (per his admission to a reporter), 'check the tape' were some of the words you used. We checked the tape and you performed a stupid athlete trick.

2) Ty Lawson - You lead the UNC Tarheels to the brink of a National title along with Tyler Hansbrough and other than not being able to shoot, you do a good job as a point guard. You show up at the Orlando Pre-Draft camp and test as short, and not as long as people would hope. You go out and dominate a game at that camp (against a lessor talent) and then sit out the rest of the camp with an injury (supposedly). Your draft stock seems to be rising and you setup workouts with NBA teams in hopes of being selected in the first round (late teens to early 20's). As you can even read, there have been a lot of athletes lately who have done some stupid athlete tricks, so you decide that you aren't going to do that because a lot of teams (NFL, NBA) are looking for good character guys which could help where you get drafted. BUT no,....you decide that at the young age of 20 (not legal yet) you are going to go out and start 'dranking' and get caught. Now since Ty is only 20, I attribute a lot of this to youthful indiscretion. This doesn't rank as high on the stupid athlete meter but it will hurt his draft stock.

3) Odell Thurman - Drafted in 2005 and came out of the gate as a game changer. Led the Bengals in tackles with 106 in 2005, the same time he was up for Rookie of the Year honors. He gets suspended 4 games for missing a NFL drug test and then is further suspended for the year after an arrest in 06. The league made that suspension last for 2006 and 2007. He is allowed back in the game in 2008 and the Bengals are on board with bringing him back. He doesn't show up for an camp and the Bengals decide to part ways. It seemed cruel at the time because Thurman had just lost his grandmother and was taking that loss very hard. Now the word is out that he failed another test and he is being indefinitely suspended from the NFL. That is a tough pill to swallow for a kid that is having it all hit him at once. Supposedly there is a history of alcohol abuse and that may be the issue. Get some help. Then find a way to make some money, because your NFL career is over. (I honestly feel sorry for this kid because knowing how alcohol can have a negative effect on lives and how hard it is to break away from it,...I just hope that he can get his life back from this, forget football for a while.)

4) Nick Kaczur is one of the people who help keep Tom Brady's uniform clean. He was arrested during a traffic stop for having OxyContin in his truck. We are led to believe that he was charged with drug possession but not much else. He supposedly 'tricked' on his supplier and cooperated with the government to catch his alleged supplier. What do we learn from this? Well, according to Kaczur, he has no idea where this story came from or anything about it. He has said that he didn't cooperate with the government. The Patriots have said that he will be dealt with from the team standpoint and they are going to do that behind closed doors. The interesting question is, what does a cheat (Belicheck) do to a guy on his team who is accused of being a rat (Kaczur)? I think that even Belicheck hates a rat. Did this stupid athlete trick pay off? TBD.

5) Chris Wilcox is from a small town in NC, called Whiteville. Nothing much to do down there, but it has some perks (very small ones). Wilcox grew up there and then went on to Maryland to play basketball for the Terps. He is now in the final year of his 3 year deal with the Sonics and is a decent power forward when given the opportunity (not sure if he has been given that in the league). He is arrested on a gun charge after a routine traffic stop in Whiteville. He and his friend are arrested and released on $500 bond. No big deal on the money side, except for the fact that he's in the last year of his contract and his team may package him up to send to another team just for salary cap purposes. He may end up on a team on the bench and not in a position to showcase his skills. The fact that this is the second time he's had a gun issue (2005, Maryland - although dropped because of a mess up on the police's part) makes him questionable in some eyes of GMs around the league. Right now, you have guys who may not have all of the skillset, but they won't show up on the police blotter and help your franchise look like the Jailblazers. Those are the guys that GMs want to pay money to, not someone that is questionable. You have the money, get your guns registered so that you are not packin heat and putting your lifestyle in jeopardy.

Now some may say that I'm being hard by calling these stupid athlete tricks, but that's not the intent. I am saying that their actions are stupid and I'm not trying to offend any one's cognitive ability. My thing is that most of these guys are living most of our dreams, to play professional sports and make professional sports money. With that, you can bypass a lot of the drama by not doing the stupid stuff that will keep you in the papers. Wise up and protect yourselves. I can be hired to help you not do the stupid stuff, just write me a check.

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